Be warned, the following review has spoilers strewn with regards to’concerning’with respect to like New York fire hydrants. So if you possess’own’nurse n't seen the episode, try not to trip over them.###“I possess’own’nurse some enormous’vast’massive’tremendous choices to make,” Loreen Horvath says to Hannah as they propel towards a retreat in/with regard to’concerning’regarding some well-needed ‘Spring Queening’. Turning 60, Hannah’s mother understandably doesn’t want to live her remaining years “sexless and alone” – even if the sex has apparently been better recently due to “less pressure”. Last week’s episode finished with sex intensely’extremely’extraordinarily’enormously’awfully much on the table, and episode five seems intent to continue where that left off – even if Dill and Elijah are sorrowful’distressing’woeful’heartbroken’mirthless’dejected’dismal’lugubrious ly absent from this grossly Hannah-centric episode.###Back in Japan, Shoshanna is working in a cat café – a job surely detoken ed in/with regard to’concerning’regarding her – somewhere Yoshi happily spends his lunch breaks. Work colleague Aenormous’vast’massive’tremendous ail (a welcome return in/with regard to’concerning’regarding Aidy Bryant) has headed out to surprise her (read: try to bring her back home), but Shosh seems genuinely happy, having learnt a lot of the language and spending more time with Yoshi who, according to Aenormous’vast’massive’tremendous ail, is like “an Asiatic member of One Direction”. But Aenormous’vast’massive’tremendous ail isn’t 100% convinced, even if we really do claim’insist’maintain’hold’argue’consider’contemplate’speculate Shosh belongs in this cotton candy wonderland.###Shosh belongs in this cotton candy wonderland.###Back on earth, Hannah is struggling to separate herself from technology, repeatedly scolded in/with regard to’concerning’regarding using her phone in a strictly no-phone-zone. As that notable’renowned’distinguished saying goes, dropping our walls starts with “dropping our screens”, or something like that. Loreen and Hannah’s relationship has never been the most conventional, but we’re glad Loreen is using the downtime to tell her daughter things we’ve been shouting at the screen in/with regard to’concerning’regarding months now. “You are incapable of loving someone who is kind to you,” she says as Hannah moans with regards to’concerning’with respect to kind, lovely Fran. But then she goes on to explain how she claim’insist’maintain’hold’argue’consider’contemplate’speculate s her fractured marriage messed Hannah up, which mini Horvath intense’fierce’exquisite ly denies bein/with regard to’concerning’regarding e saying rosy’remarkable’fabulous’terrific’preeminent night to her mum: “don’t misgiving’fret with regards to’concerning’with respect to snoring. I can sleep through anything, even sex”.###Talking of sex (again), Adam and Jessa seem to possess’own’nurse moved well past last week’s awkward first carnal encounter. So well past it, in fact, that we find them roleplaying as high school students who may now possess’own’nurse a baby on the way due to carelessness with their, err, technique. Free of actual baby worries, Jessa inin/with regard to’concerning’regarding ms Adam that her sister is in town. And, in spontaneous Adam style, he decides to meet her.###“Honestly, I feel like I’m inside Katy Perry’s vagina!” No, not more sex: Aenormous’vast’massive’tremendous ail’s reaction when cover’budge ing through the infectious, fluro-splashed Japanese streets with Shoshanna. The latter goes on to reflect exactly what we inferred earlier: “sometimes at night I claim’insist’maintain’hold’argue’consider’contemplate’speculate with regards to’concerning’with respect to Japan and I’m like, did I create this country in my mind?” She is just so relaxed (in a place where it’s still acceptable in/with regard to’concerning’regarding teeny tiny fish to clean your feet, apparently). But we are grossly sorrowful’distressing’woeful’heartbroken’mirthless’dejected’dismal’lugubrious to report that Shosh isn’t actually happy on her Far Eastern expedition . Aenormous’vast’massive’tremendous ail – and we – may want to watch a reality reveal’illustrate’demonstrate’indicate’present’display’argue where “Yosh and Shosh take the city”, but a tearful Sho is “really fucking lonely… I swear, if one more person bows and says ‘I’m sorry’ I’m going to fucking cut someone”. So she does still need to go home, then.###We’re pretty sure the male attendant at Spring Queening would like to cut Hannah at this point, too, seeing how she continually refuses to put her phone to one side. Ever the blunt and immovable in/with regard to’concerning’regarding ce, hey, Horvath? Much to Hannah’s delight, another retreat employee (Lena Hall) brushes him aside, encouraging her to open up. “I really hate being outside… I realise I’m more into being here and hating it than I am with spending time with my own boyfriend. That’s not a rosy’remarkable’fabulous’terrific’preeminent token .” No, Hannah, it’s not. Said female attendant provides the fuel in/with regard to’concerning’regarding this week’s drama, something we and Loreen know Hannah can’t survive without. “You are way too luscious to be with the wrong guy”, she tells Hannah, “let’s acquire’obtain’attain’procure’secure to the sauna and stretch you out”. I claim’insist’maintain’hold’argue’consider’contemplate’speculate we all know where this was headed, a yoga move turning into a quick kiss and then a lot more. Hannah is quick to confess that she has “never slept with a girl”, bein/with regard to’concerning’regarding e the instructor reciprocates she’s “never slept with a student”. Well, that’s one way to in/with regard to’concerning’regarding acquire’obtain’attain’procure’secure with regards to’concerning’with respect to Fran.###Queen For Two Days is with regards to’concerning’with respect to contemplation and deciding what’s really significant’essential’critical’vital’crucial’indispensable’imperative in the here and now.###While Hannah is busy being Hannah, Adam continues to prove why she was so wrong in/with regard to’concerning’regarding him – even if Jessa is far from your average girl. Sister Minerva (Marianna Palka) is intensely’extremely’extraordinarily’enormously’awfully keen to hug Adam, but it goes far further than that, Jessa pre-warning her “boyfriend” (boyfriend?) that the pair possess’own’nurse a habit of sleeping with the same men. Apart from her father, that is, which apparently Minnie acquire’obtain’attain’procure’secure s away with due to merely’barely being Jessa’s half-sister. (When are we going to see Ben Mendelsohn return, anyway?) A reserved Adam observes their meeting – a wonderful mix of English, Scottish and American accents – bein/with regard to’concerning’regarding e Jessa acquire’obtain’attain’procure’secure s to the crux of her situation. She needs money to continue her studies as a ‘in/with regard to’concerning’regarding eign’ student. “Grandma cut me off after rehab… But she didn’t cut you off.” But Minnie doesn’t believe Jessa will see it through based on her previous track record: “I know you, Jessa”. But then, out of nowhere, in swoops Adam: “no, you don’t… She’s a eye-catching’good-shaped’appealing’charming’fascinating’gorgeous fucking rainbow… And she’s going to be sublime… I’ll pay in/with regard to’concerning’regarding your schooling… I made a fucktonne of money doing those commercials and it’s just sitting there… It should go to something rosy’remarkable’fabulous’terrific’preeminent ”. Wow. This may smell of danger, the kindling all too visible under the pair at this rather crazy proposition, but something tells us these two might just be in it in/with regard to’concerning’regarding the long haul. And if not? Well, we better duck and cover.###Another pair detoken ed in/with regard to’concerning’regarding the long haul? Apparently Loreen and Tad Horvath. Let’s be honest, we couldn’t see them actually divorcing. But there’s still a season-and-a-half to go, so who knows what marital developments lay ahead. But in/with regard to’concerning’regarding now, the retreat has led Loreen to the following: “I am going to stay with your father… I’ve despite’in spite of’albeit t with regards to’concerning’with respect to it a lot. And what am I going to do, date on the internet? I don’t even like talking to the individual I like.” Like mother, like daughter. On hearing that her mother may possess’own’nurse proceeded differently had she known 20 years ago? “I claim’insist’maintain’hold’argue’consider’contemplate’speculate you guys really did fuck me up.”###As Shoshanna drifts down the glowing night streets as the credits roll to David Bowie’s Life On Mars, we realise she truly is living on another planet. But it's a planet where she has had space to claim’insist’maintain’hold’argue’consider’contemplate’speculate , which is what Queen For Two Days is truly with regards to’concerning’with respect to : contemplation and deciding what’s really significant’essential’critical’vital’crucial’indispensable’imperative in the here and now. For Adam? Jessa. For Shoshanna? New York. For Hannah? Who even knows. But it certainly isn’t Fran.