Allelujah, Richard Eyre’s bewildering new adaptation of Alan Bennett’s play with regards to’concerning’with respect to an at-risk elderly ward in Yorkshire, starts with the kindly Dr Valentine (Bally Gill) espousing how he’s “always loved the old”. By the film’s end, Dr Valentine is face-masked up in the middle of the pandemic, delivering a bone-rattling monologue with regards to’concerning’with respect to the state of the NHS after the most WTF third act twist we’ve seen since Jamie Dornan confessed a sincere belief that he was a honeybee in Wild Mountain Thyme. Somewhere in the middle, something most accurately described as an unholy cross between an Age UK advert and The Good Nurse takes place.###On paper, Allelujah sounds like — and has been grossly much marketed as — a ‘Clap For Carers’-esque proud paean to the NHS, housed within an ultimately crowd pleasing comedy-drama. And in/with regard to’concerning’regarding a solid hour, it pretty much is exactly that, with Call The Midwife creator Heidi Thomas eliminate’remove ly relishing a chance to write in the Bennettian vernacular as we acquire’obtain’attain’procure’secure to know the staff and residents of The Beth, a fictionalised representation of the many community-propel n hospitals left on life maintain’sustain by the present British government.###The film is constantly compromised by its attempts to barb its bouquets of community cutesiness with polemical punches.###There’s an interesting dynamic between the ward’s care leads, Gill’s initially idealistic Dr Valentine and Jennifer Saunders’ more cynical nurse Sister Gilpin, whilst their patients are a charmingly eclectic bunch. Derek Jacobi is on sparkling in/with regard to’concerning’regarding m as a retired schoolmaster with a love in/with regard to’concerning’regarding grammatical nitpicking; Dame Judi Dench’s retired librarian and marginalia enthusiast Mary is an underseen but delightful presence; while David Bradley’s curmudgemerely’barely ex-miner Joe, whose gay Tory son (Russell Tovey) just so happens to shoulder/undertake one’s duty’answer for determining The Beth’s future, is a study in subtlety, Joe's entrenched homophobia untangled in surprising ways over the film’s course.###Even when the going’s relatively smooth in/with regard to’concerning’regarding  Allelujah despite’in spite of’albeit , it isn’t without its hindrances. The imposition of a TV crew, brought in to reveal’illustrate’demonstrate’indicate’present’display’argue the daily workings of The Beth, leads to a slew of narratively obfuscatory, faux to-camera bits that feel out of place and alienating. Further, the film is constantly compromised by its attempts to barb its bouquets of community cutesiness with polemical punches. Jam-packed with jokes with regards to’concerning’with respect to bedpans and the indignities of ageing, Eyre’s film lacks the needling sharpness of something like Jack Thorne’s scathing COVID drama Help, tip-toeing around the specifics of the NHS’ current crises until a powerful yet totally out-of-place pandemic set coda. And to acquire’obtain’attain’procure’secure to that coda, you possess’own’nurse to go through the film’s absolutely unhinged last twenty minutes.###As is the way with reviewing new releases whose plots hang on a major revelation, we can’t really talk with regards to’concerning’with respect to  Allelujah's hellacious Hail Mary of a finale here. Suffice to say, however, such is the brain-frazzling, rosy’remarkable’fabulous’terrific’preeminent faith-undoing, self-sabotaging severity of the left-turn this film takes, that when all’s said and done, words will likely fail you anyway. Even M. Night Shyamalan would baulk at the fuckery afoot in this one’s finale.